WHAT IS LOVE?.

Some nights back while I was on my bed and gradually drifting off to sleep, my phone beeped and it was a message but my sleepy self was going to ignore the message but my heart tugged at me to check the message. Knowing fully well that if I didn't check the message I won't sleep so I gave in and reluctantly checked what it was.


It was a message from a good friend of mine and quite a lengthy message saying love is this and love is that and asked me if really that is what love is. So I replied him saying "love conquers all and all of the attributes you mentioned are true.....that I know." so I resumed to drift off again when my phone beeped again. Same friend asking another question "WHAT IS LOVE" in capital letter. The answer was a simple one but I knew answering him would mean more questions and I really needed to get my beauty sleep (lol) so I called him to say "I will answer your question but as a blog post. You can read up to see my answer but I really want to sleep". So that is how I find myself moving my topic of this week to next week (smiles........).


Still in my sleepy state before finally allowing myself to sleep, I answered the question in my heart "love is love" simple.


Writing now I am asking myself howelse do I describe the word that brought about creation, same word that brought about the very existence of man. Where else can I find the answer to the question if not in the question itself. No greater word to define love if not defining it in itself. Every word used to describe love will always come back to take it true meaning from the word itself (love). Patience, trust, affection, care, selflessness, long-suffering e.t.c all take their root from love. That is why I said love is love.


Love is an action and a doing word. A conscious effort to act and to do, a conscious effort to see it all around you, a conscious effort to  give it to others, a conscious effort to show it to others, a conscious effort to see it in others, a conscious effort to continue to make that conscious effort.


A conscious effort to find it everywhere. In simple gestures like a handshake, a hug, in receiving a smile and giving a smile, in laughter. Something as simple as saying hello.  When we make such efforts to find love in simple things then it becomes a part of us, it's much easier to give it to others and much easier to find it all around you.

Agree or disagree comments are welcomed. Kisses and hugs.

HURTBAE

I have been trying really hard to avoid talking about relationships, but I discovered it's inevitable if I will be doing general talks and writings.  Relationships are the basic unit of human co-existence either father-daugther, mother-son, brother-sister, boyfriend-girlfriend, hubby-wifey e.t.c. sigh........ So I give in (laughs). Let me just blow my trumpet a little (and this is for your ears only..........i am a love expert lol). Did I just say that (eyes rolling......lol). I am just like my friend Olaf.......winks.

So there is this video that has gone viral about two exes who confronted each other on infidelity (#hurtbae). The after effect of watching that video was that I was mute for a while. She had loved him, he had taken her for granted and she was hurt. I don't want to go into women are naturally like this and men have this and that in their DNA...........sigh I have done that before.She had questions to ask or probably had little hope that there is something left of the relationship when she agreed to do that video but either ways she needed the answer to help her move on. Sigh.....this is now like a trend in relationships , I have seen it happen before and trust me when I say it didn't happen in a movie (lol).


I want to say that it is easy for people on the other end to say oh.......she should have done this, she should have left when he did that, I can't accept that from no body. Seriously......really, you think she never thought of all that?, you think she never for once knew what the right thing was for her to do?...... It takes all your sanity put together to walk out of a toxic relationship when you truly love that person. I read the comment session and I had a good laugh at some of the reaction but really nobody should curse out at him or her because you never know what you will do if you find your self in such a relationship

We see the power of choice play out here, he cheated, his choice....... She stayed, her choice.........he hurt her, a reaction from his choice to cheat........she hurt herself, a reaction from her her choice to stay. While we have no choice to choose what happens in our relatioship, we have a choice to choose how we are treated, what we accept, what not to accept which eventaully leads to how the relationship turns out.

He had asked her a question that caught my attention....he said "why didn't you leave when you could not bring yourself to trust me again rather than put yourself through the trouble of snooping" and she said "I guess I was stupid". I read this somewhere and it said "immaturity is when you are stupid and you don't know you are while maturity is when  you are stupid and you know you are". Funny as it sounds but it's true but I don't agree with her on her answer of being stupid but then it's true that when you truly love someone you take all they throw at you just to have that little moment of happiness with them or have them stay in your life a little longer no matter how much it hurts you. I guess that is the basic reason why we are having history repeat itself in toxic relationship.

Agree or disagree comments are welcomed.....xoxo.

PEACOCK PRIDE VS TURKEY PRIDE.

I  have a friend who always gives me this reply "it's not pride that goes before a fall but arrogance" each time I tell him pride goes before a fall (smiles). He will go further to explain that it's a misinterpretation of the Bible from the Greek language to English language(lol). I agree with him since I know that too much of pride is arrogance and I also know that to live life, we need a certain amount of pride.

Recently, I saw a turkey walking on the street and when it saw other chickens, it started to show off all its glorious feathers and walking like her royal highness. I watched and didn't know when I smiled really hard. It was interesting watching the show of power between two creatures of the same famil(birds). Unfortunately for the turkey other than me and other passersby who watched briefly, the chickens cared less for all the glorious walk the turkey was showing off (lol).

There is a common saying in the Yoruba language (ígàrá turkey). This means turkey's pride and it is used majorly on people who have a show of too much pride (arrogance). So what do I conclude a Turkey's pride to be : act of arrogating, making undue claim in an overbearing manner, exorbitant claim of rank, contempt of others, lordliness,exalting your importance to an undue degree, haughtiness, self assumption, presumption and feeling indispensable.

I remembered seeing a peacock a long time ago. A little before the age of ten or a little above the age of ten in all of its glory. I still remember it's bright colours and large feathers. Comparing a peacock to a turkey now, I know the peacock has much bigger and brighter feathers than that of a turkey. I remember watching and smiling too. Unfortunately for the peacock there was no peahen around (lol). But I enjoyed watching the display.

Peacocks are believed to show off their feathers as an act of vanity but it's not. Peacocks fan out their feathers for a completely different reason than people think (it's a form of courtship ritual to attract a mate) . So what do I conclude a peacocks pride to be: self respect, unwilling to accept humiliation, being a unique individual, not accepting less, not succuming to pressures, not feeling inadequate, courageous, self worth,  self esteem, confidence, bravery and bold.

Sometimes when people choose to not be disrespected, they say it's pride. No!!!  I disagree. Self pride is different from arrogance just the way the peacock and turkey fan out their feathers for different reasons. Unlike the turkey that shows off it's feather to either pick a fight or to protect it's food, you can use your peacock pride to attract the right kind of people (lol). You can influence a person's attitude towards you. A person who has no self respect will not know how to give respect to others. So use your peacock pride well (lol).

Did I mention that I like to eat turkey and I have never eaten a peacock before (lol). Now that I said that is peacock edible (thinking.....smiles).

Agree or disagree comments are welcomed (kisses and hugs).